Life For Now (26th Dec 2013)

5 more days and it's bye bye 2013 and welcome 2014

Moments like this is when I miss being home. If I am at home right now, we would be having so much fun, spending time with the family and close friends. 

Do you know how it feels when everything is squeezing from side to side? Sucks right.. but what to do, it's just the way things are so I have no other choice but to suck it up. Exam is on 2nd Jan, next week and I have a lot to study yet I don't really feel the drive anymore. Hmm. I need to step up but yet..............

Here I am making this blog post. Just needed the space to rant out. Will continue studying in a bit. Hehe

Being away from home, not being able to celebrate Christmas with the family has made me realize how precious a family is. Of course, being here, having friends do help with the homesickness and etc but they can never replace the family that I have back home; church family and real family. So much love :)

What I want to say, treasure your family. Love them no matter what baggage they come with. I miss my mom and dad. The thing about being at home that I do dislike sometimes, is how certain family members tend to baby me. I sorta needed to make peace with the fact that no matter how big I'm gonna be, I'll always be the tiny little baby in their eyes. Sometimes it does make me feel restless, like I just wish they can give me space and ....... Not that they don't, it's just that they're too protective that I can't seem to discover things on my own. But hey it isn't so bad actually. :)

You know what, I truly believe that I needed to be thankful, everyday, for the little things. Simple stuff like being able to further study (not everyone can afford that), able to live life freely (imagine the old days when girls can't really do things freely, kinda sad), able to enjoy food (imagine the sick people who can't eat properly) , being loved for who I am (imagine if everyone has this, how less heartless this world will be), having the ability to accept myself for who I am (it's okay to not be perfect..) , my parents are healthy, I have a nanny who loves me a lot, like I'm her real daughter..( my mom is the queen of my heart but I am blessed to have someone who loves me like I'm her baby) :)

You see, life isn't so complicated, messy when you're being grateful.

Granted, life sucks and it can be really mean..

But it's not the end of the world.

I'm blessed

Things are not perfect the way I wish they are

But I am loved, I am alive

 (no not alive as in just going through the motion but alive as in feeling that way)

Life isn't all goody goody but I'm learning and trying to have fun along the way. 

Not everyone is blessed enough to have that or have the ability to see hoe much blessing they have. 

For everything I have and everything good I was given the chance to be a part of, THANK YOU GOD :)

And if you're reading this and you feel a bit lost, hurt or whatsoever bad feelings, I hope you'll find peace. Somehow. But most important is, I hope you find love. I mean, not just romantic kinda love but the love that accepts you no matter what it is that you have done, did or going to do in the future. The kinda love that fills all the empty holes in your life and your heart. That is Christ's love. I'm just saying based on my life experience. I know I am young but I do have moments in life when everything is falling apart and I was breaking into pieces and that love, was the one that saved me. For that I am grateful. Forever.